Slices Of Life

By: Jill Pertler

I recently wrote a column about dating after a certain age – 50 to be exact. At the start, I planned on a brief column. How much could there be to write about such a dire subject?

Turns out I was wrong. There are myriad factors to dating – at any age, but especially after 50.

Remember dating? Most people dabbled in the sport during their teens and 20s. The lucky among us ended it there. We found our special someone and left the dating pool to the tadpoles.

But then, some of us – too many of us – are thrown back in, much later than we ever thought possible. Imagine dating three decades (or so) after you thought you’d put that chapter of your life behind you, and imagine the surprises and changes it might entail.

Imagine the humor of dating (or attempting to do so) after 50. Again, I have no firsthand knowledge of this late-dating phenomenon. I’m only observing and assuming, which isn’t always prudent. You might want to close your eyes during the scariest parts, because it isn’t always pretty. But it can be fun and maybe even funny.

The following are my further thoughts on the subject. I reserve the right to return with more (thoughts) in the future. It’s turned into a subject that just keeps on giving. Too bad dating – at any age – can’t be more like that.

My thoughts, part two:

Dating in your 20s: You look for someone who is a good listener.

Dating after 50: You look for someone who is willing to wear their hearing aids so they are able to listen to you.

20’s: It’s appealing when someone has a good head for business.

After 50: It’s appealing when someone has a good head of hair.

20’s: You look for someone with the potential for wealth.

After 50: You look for someone with the potential for health.

20s: You covet tickets to the concert of the newest pop band.

After 50: You covet tickets to the concert of a classic rock band.

20’s: You look for someone who doesn’t cheat.

After 50: You look for someone who doesn’t cheat at gin rummy.

20s: Dating someone with wrinkled shirts makes them less attractive.

After 50: You realize wrinkled faces show character.

20s: You need furniture.

After 50: You need someone who needs the old furniture you no longer need.

20s: You seek someone who likes kids and spending their life around them.

After 50: You seek someone who likes grandkids and spending an occasional weekend around them.

20s: You enjoy a vacation that involves boozing.

After 50: You enjoy a vacation that involves cruising.

20s: Your ideal match is a golfer with a low handicap.

After 50: Your ideal match is a golfer with no handicap.

Dating after 50 involves baggage, and not just the kind you check at the airport before boarding your plane. While I’m no expert, and probably never will be, I do enjoy making observations. I’ve noticed definitive differences between dating in your youth versus dating, well, after that. The contrasts are humorous – laughable, even.

And what is life about if it doesn’t include laughter?

Well, that and pickleball, followed by an early-bird dinner.

Jill Pertler is an award-winning syndicated columnist, published playwright and author. Don’t miss a slice; follow the Slices of Life page on Facebook.